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(credit) Calendar | Spread the Love by Melanie Linder @ Etsy:

On my quest for fulfilling lovely life-goals, I take inspiration from Dr. Cara Barker.


* Excerpt from Dr. Cara Barker’s “Resolving What Really Matters: 7 Practices for a Fresh New Year” :

REASONS

…We make far too many dusty, old resolutions that lack any sense of vitality or joy. This dishonors life. Too often we get hung up in “shoulds.” Blessedly, there’s a remedy. Let’s get started…

AWARENESS

…Without awareness we cannot grow, live the lives we would like to live or discover how to be more loving in our hearts while there’s still time. Without awakening and valuing what we do have, we remain stuck in focusing on lack and set ourselves up for more of the same.

The truth is this: We simply do not know where we will be one year from now, much less tomorrow. This being the case, what do you want to make of today so that you feel great about yourself? I’m not talking about adding stress or taking on a mad-dash attitude! The last thing either of us needs is one more thing for the to-do list.

No, I’m thinking more about what you’d like to drop from your life that would improve your sense of gratitude. For example, what “accounts” do you need to close in order to live freely? How could you do so simply?

Dare I say it: how could you lower the bar to what’s been unrealistic?  …

SEVEN GUIDELINES TO GET YOU STARTED

Here’s the primary question to ask yourself: If you were to write a truly fresh life chapter that would rejuice you this upcoming year, what ground must you prepare today?

1. Recall the gratitude you have for what others have given…Make your list.

2. Recall the personal challenges that have helped you grow. Find compassion for the simple expressions of good that have come your way…Tell those who’ve assisted your unfolding.

3. Recall moments of beauty. Beauty comes out of chaos. (I am grateful for the forest outside my window, the pond beside the forest, the hummingbirds at the feeder this December.) Share the memory with someone you love. Ask them theirs.

4. Recall the new people, places and things you discovered that touched you most. … Write a thank-you notes in three sentences or less, and send them.

5. Recall the dreams that have continued to stir your heart, pressing your spirit to express them while you still can. … Ask someone you love about their current dream, and share your own.

6. Recall the unexpected moments of encouragement you’ve found in nature, in the stillness, or in a glance or look from another living creature that have reminded you that connection lives, and that life is richest when appreciating the simple things.

7. Recall one favorite moment from this year that touched you deeply. (I remember my grandbaby touching my cheek, again and again, as she drifted off to sleep, and the awareness that what matters most, at the end of the day, is love.) Thank whomever needs thanking...

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(Kotama Bouabane @ 20×200)

* Excerpt from Not Always Easy | Meant To Be @ DailyOm:

GOALS & DREAMS 

Some of our goals and dreams come to fruition so easily that it is as if an unseen hand has done much of the work for us.  When this happens, we say it must have been meant to be.  

On the other hand, when dreams and goals require a tremendous amount of effort, we may interpret this to mean that our dream is not meant to be.  However, difficulty is not necessarily a sign that our hopes and plans are ill-fated.  On the contrary, difficulties and challenges along the path can be important parts of the project’s overall meaning…

OVERCOMING OBSTACLES 

….There is a unique satisfaction that comes to us when we succeed at something that has been a challenge.  Our sense of self-reliance expands, and our ability to endure and keep the faith is stronger for having been tested.

We learn that we are capable of confronting and overcoming the obstacles in our path, and this empowers us to dream still bigger dreams, knowing that we will not be daunted by the challenges inherent in birthing them. 

CONTINUE OR LET IT GO?

When we find ourselves facing difficulties with a particular plan or project, the chances are we know already whether we are meant to continue on or let it go.  We simply need to look within ourselves for the answer.

When an idea is meant to be, it comes back to us time and time again.  Then we know we can go forward, no matter what challenges arise, knowing that it is meant to be.


– Read the whole article, Not Always Easy | Meant To Be @ DailyOm

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(Fear is Good card by Amy Ruben Flett @ Etsy)


REJECT [ri-jekt]: (1) to refuse to accept, consider, submit to, take for some purpose, or use; (2) to refuse to hear, receive, or admit; (3) rebuff, repel; (4) to refuse as lover or spouse;  (5) obsolete : to cast off; (6) throw back, repulse.

REJECTION BITES

Forget about the boogie-man or even death for that matter.  Turns out, our deepest fear is rejection.  Our egos are so fragile that we often let life pass us by because we’re afraid of rejection.  Not getting the job, not getting the promotion, not getting the girl/guy, etc.  Thus we’re continually afraid of what might be, could be; of the future; of something, anything, that which we don’t have evidence will even occur.

We’re so afraid of the possibility of failure.  We fear making mistakes.  We’re so afraid to shatter our carefully-constructed egos.  Boy, we sure do give a lot of unnecessary power to this perceived notion of “rejection’!  Guilty party over here [points finger to myself].  Sigh.

THE AVOIDANCE TACTIC

Yet I’m so incredibly clever and creative when it comes to avoiding rejection, by coming up with every excuse possible to avoid rejection and, turns out, avoid living life to the fullest.  Damn, that’s annoying!  We know it, too, don’t we?  Yeah, we do.  We know we do this.  I know I do this.  But we keep on doing it.  We keep on letting rejection get the better of us.  We keep on making excuses, keep on being “safe,” keep on settling for “good enough,” keep on maintaing the status quo, keep on being afraid to rock the boat, keep on living a vanilla existence, keep on being afraid of living our best lives possible, the life we deserve, because we beat ourselves up and think we don’t deserve it after all.

[Before in the past, I have allowed fear to hover over me.  Honestly, had no idea why…that is until I went to counseling, which by the way, is some amazing stuff — how come nobody told me about this before?!? — but I digres.]

We’re damaged in some way; perhaps merely bruised, unfortunately sometimes broken…and this is often what it is that keeps us captive and bonded to fear.  We know this, we do, but for some reason, hardwired or not, we let it happen…we stay complicit.

THE LIGHT

So, one day I’m going about everyday business, not even thinking I fear anything, when I begin to listen…I mean, really listen, to a broadcast of Tapestry on CBC radio with a another feature with Rabbi Harold Kushner, this time focusing on his book about fear.  He goes into how rejection is our big-ticket fear.  Yet our spiritual guides out there, including God in the Bible, continually remind us to “Fear not.” Rabbi Kushner states that “being afraid diminishes our humanity.  If we let fear take over our lives, our humanity is diminished.” (Part I – another Rabbi Kushner post is here).

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